Learning how to love yourself is a skill often overlooked in our fast-paced lives, where there always seems to be something „more important“ than paying attention to ourselves. Consciously or unconsciously, we suppress all the signs our bodies and minds give us that it’s time to stop for a moment and give love… to ourselves!
Self-love is fundamental for good mental health and well-being. It is vital for developing positive self-esteem and resilience against life’s challenges and difficulties. Moreover, when we know how to love ourselves, we are more likely to set healthy boundaries, seek and accept help, and grow as individuals.
But how do we cultivate self-love?
Self-love is not a quick or easy process. It involves various techniques and strategies supported by scientific research and professional advice. In this article, we will explore some of these strategies, presented as a brief guide with steps that will bring you closer to the skill of loving yourself!
How to love yourself | Tips and techniques from clinical psychologist Violeta Al Samara
Self-love is vital for our mental health. Studies show that people with high levels of self-love are more resilient to stress and more likely to have positive social relationships. Self-love also significantly reduces the risk of developing mental disorders like depression and anxiety.
But how do we love ourselves? Developing self-love requires conscious effort and practice.
Here are some tried and true methods:
Inner child technique
Each of us carries our inner child within. This technique involves turning to that child and giving it love. This is the first step towards learning to love yourself.
Find a quiet and cozy place at home or outdoors, where no one will disturb you, so you can relax completely. Close your eyes and visualize yourself as a child. Take a good look at that child! Is it happy, anxious, or afraid of something? What is it trying to tell you? This is the voice of your past traumas and weaknesses, which still have an impact on you.
Once you sense how your „inner child“ feels and what it needs, give it your support, understanding, acceptance, and love! Through this technique, some childhood traumas can be processed and overcome, leading to better self-esteem.
Self-love journal:
The first step toward self-love is becoming aware of our thoughts and feelings. Keeping a journal where you regularly write down positive thoughts and affirmations about yourself can help you better understand your inner world and develop a positive self-identity.
Take your favorite notebook. Regularly write in it at least one reason or moment from the day that made you feel good about yourself, feel accepted, liked, and loved, and be more self-confident.
Practice self-compassion
When facing difficulties or failures, it’s important to be compassionate towards yourself instead of criticizing yourself. This involves understanding and accepting your mistakes and imperfections.
Take time at least once every two weeks to reflect on the challenges you’ve faced in recent days, whether small or large. It’s important to accept all setbacks, failures, fears, or difficulties without criticizing yourself for them. This allows us to grow and learn from our mistakes.
Visualization techniques and affirmations in front of the mirror
Visualizing positive scenarios and achievements can help improve self-esteem and increase motivation to achieve your goals and dreams.
Regularly repeating positive affirmations in front of a mirror helps strengthen self-love and how you perceive yourself. Use positive affirmations to change negative thoughts and beliefs about yourself. Say positive phrases to yourself daily, such as „I am worthy of love and respect.“
Yoga and breathing exercises
These practices can help reduce stress, calm the mind, focus on positive thoughts, and increase positive emotions. Start practicing yoga, meditation, or breathing exercises. Soon, you will notice a change in yourself; you will begin to love your body and soul and be in complete balance and harmony.
In addition to the methods mentioned above, various psychological therapies can help us understand how to love ourselves. Each offers unique techniques and approaches to encourage a positive attitude toward ourselves. Some of these psychological therapies include:
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most effective methods for developing self-love. CBT helps people identify and change negative thought patterns and develop a more positive self-image.
Gestalt therapy
Gestalt therapy is an approach to psychotherapy developed in the 1940s and 1950s by Fritz Perls, Laura Perls, and Paul Goodman. It emphasizes awareness of the present moment and personal responsibility. It aims to integrate all aspects of experience—thoughts, feelings, and actions—into a complete and fulfilling life. Gestalt therapy can be particularly helpful in developing self-love and a positive self-image.
Narrative therapy
This therapy is based on the idea that our lives are shaped by the stories we tell about ourselves and our experiences. Narrative therapy helps individuals reframe and retell their personal stories in ways that support the development of self-love.
„Embrace Yourself“ by Violeta Al Samara
Would you like to understand yourself better and learn how to practice techniques for developing self-love? Let me introduce you to my first book, „Embrace Yourself“! It is a valuable guide for anyone who wants to improve their self-esteem and build a deeper connection with themselves.
Begin your transformative journey towards self-love with a small step today. Because by loving yourself, you not only improve the quality of your own life, but you also become a better friend, partner, and parent, feeling more fulfilled and content.
And if you need professional help, you can book your online consultation here.
